TOP 5 TIPS ON DINING OUT ALONE + TIONG BAHRU CAFES

Not only do I go out alone, I actually enjoy it. Perhaps it's growing up an only child kind of thing, this level of comfort with being on my own. Maybe it's even an impatience with having to deal with other people at times. Or, as it is in my personal opinion, maybe it's simply the product of a deep relationship with one's self - whether it's already cultivated or just only starting to. Whatever it is, this didn't always come automatically.

Whatever your reason is for going out alone - it's even as simple as nobody else is free - I'm sure panic has crossed your mind at some point, especially when it comes to meals in high traffic establishments. I personally have had my own fair share of worries, coz it didn't "seem natural". What will other people think of me? and What does this say about myself? were some of the things that crossed my mind. What got me through is remembering that these are just constructs our brains came up with; there's no law that says a person can't eat dinner or watch a movie or travel or pretty much whatever alone. Does it concretely affect me, what strangers think? Not really. It might bother me a bit, but at the end of the day, they're not doing anything to me. If anything, it's me who does things to myself. I can become paranoid that the whole restaurant is talking about solo-dining me, that when a server asks if I "want bread to go with that", I take it as a threat and act hostile towards her which in turn makes her pissed and badmouth me to the other staff - self-fulfilling prophecy. So yes, it's not really that bad. Like I said here, nobody really cares. Once you've tried it and come out unscathed, you become braver and what seems natural begins to shift. Until pretty soon, it becomes normal and you no longer drop your voice (and pride!) when you ask for a table for one.

I've listed a few tips to help you ease into being comfortable dining out on your own. I'm not insisting everyone must eat alone (we all have our thing and I respect that!), it's more for people who actually want to do it but haven't found the courage to do so. So, without further ado...

Reg's Top 5 Tips on Dining Out Alone

1. Try going at non-peak hours.

Hit two birds with one stone! Not only do you see less people, you up your chances of getting space at a normally very busy eatery. Such was the case when I dropped by Tiong Bahru's Forty Hands on a weekday. 

Eggs Cocotte from Forty Hands

2. Order what you want.
What normally trumps over my social anxiety on eating alone is the possibility of eating some really good food. Call me whatever, I prefer foodie though (;P), but I love food. Eating alone lets me selfishly choose my dish. I don't need to consider anyone else's preference and I can order what catches my eye without fear of being judged by another person's standards (i.e.: is it healthy? is it too little? is it too much?).

3. If a full-fledged meal is too daunting for you, try going for coffee first.
News flash, solitary wanderers frequent cafes so you won't be sticking out like a sore thumb. Cafes are a dime a dozen and what separates them is the quality of their beans (or leaves) and their interiors. Take advantage of this! Not only do you get your caffeine fix, you get to enjoy it in a cozy (or hip!) atmosphere too!

Banoffee Cake from Flock Cafe

4. A book or a journal is more than okay but remember to maintain mindful.
Alone time is a good time to catch up on reading and taking stock of your life. I personally have written a bunch of blog entries in cafes. But, nothing irks me more than seeing people who aren't eating (or drinking) take up precious table space when the place is full. Case in point: Starbucks. There's always a table with students who have long since finished their frappuccino just parking their butts studying or whatever. Nobody really cares as long as there's tables for everyone, but when it's scarce? The claws are coming off! That table is for me and my order, not for you and your text books.

5. Be in the moment.
Put your phone down (okay, after getting that insta-worthy shot) and be in the moment. Read through the menu, chat up the server, savour your food, observe your surroundings, observe yourself. To truly enjoy your solo-dining experience, you must first be in the experience. Drop pre-conceived notions and don't just go through the motions. You'd be surprised how being more in touch with your actions would lessen your mind's worries about what people think of you - if they do think about you at all.

I hope you find these tips useful! The weekend promises sunny afternoons perfect for delicious food and just as scrumptious "me time".

Let me know your experience on dining alone below!

Forty Hands is located at 78 Yong Siak Street, #01-12, Singapore 163078

Flock Cafe is located at 78 Moh Guan Terrace, #01-25, Singapore 162078